Getting back....

So I feel like I'm kind of getting back to myself. Audrey's 10 days old, and I'm feeling pretty good. Which means I have stories....

Now, if you cringe at the words "breast pump," you may want to stop reading. But for the brave souls, you might get a small chuckle.

So about 10 hours after Audrey was born, they wheeled an industrial electric breast pump into my hospital room. I'm sure they billed someone for this thing so I could use it while in the hospital. The nurse demonstrates how it works, then points out what she calls "its best feature." {Seriously, other than the main feature and purpose it was designed for?} She shows me how part detaches from the main unit to become a manual pump. She then explains to me that this will be wonderful so that I can take it camping. That's right, camping.

Apparently being 10 hours out of surgery, having an infant in the NICU, and having a feisty 2-year old all adds up to the camping trip of a lifetime. Frankly, I don't think I ever want the words "camping" and "breast pump" in the same sentence. But you will be glad to know that after I questioned whether or not I was in a drug-induced hallucination, I politely thanked her and feigned enthusiasm about my unexpected freedom to camp.